What I like most about kink is the playfulness it brings to my shared intimate experiences. It refers to 'a kink': something with a twist, something not-straight. With loads of curiosity to what we can do with our skin, impact play is born.
Through conscious kink I get to bring humor to parts of myself that otherwise stay hidden or unexpressed. I can bring lightness to my own patterns of wanting to control or of feeling small, limited in movement or choiceless.
Only this time by choice.
It's finding pleasure in what could be in other circumstances painful, uncomfortable or humiliating. I can exaggerate dynamics that are already anyway playing out for me.
Only now I get to enjoy it and it's exactly how I want it.
Many people imagine pain, rough and love-less.
However, it can be playful, exploratory and deeply intimate!
It teaches the difference
between a disempowered 'giving in' and an empowered surrender,
between a careless leader and a love-ful but clear dominant.
Conscious BDSM can be healing: it's a way to live and embrace what I otherwise might judge or push aside for myself.
It feels wholesome to acknowledge that aliveness can be found in any emotion and any expression of life.
It's all part of me,
all of life is inside of me.
